Tag Archives: flooding

Rain Result

21 Feb

Dear John,

I know you’re worried about us after all the news stories about rain and flooding in California. But we are just fine. I am writing this from somewhere in the Pacific. There has been so much rain that the house, which has been anchored to its foundation for 50 years, broke free of its moorings. I was watching a movie when it happened. Naturally, shore power immediately disconnected but my computer instantly went to battery mode, so I never noticed our house had moved until it actually bumped the neighbor’s garage as it passed. I think the neighbor’s anchor chain must be newer or stronger than mine, because his house was still there as we floated past.

All night we floated. Must’ve flowed into the American river, then joined the Sacramento River at the confluence. Downstream into the Delta, and under the Golden Gate Bridge this morning. Fogged in, as usual, we barely noticed Alcatraz until we almost hit it after an ocean-going tanker nearly swamped us in its wake.

It looks like our heading is toward the South China Sea. The Wi-fi is working, good thing we installed that long-range booster last month. Maria’s been on her ham radio so we know our current position, and we fashioned a rudimentary sextant out of the kitchen tongs and a protractor left over from geometry class. Once the rain clears we’ll be able to use dead reckoning as a navigational aid.

We have plenty of provisions, because I went grocery shopping just before we became unmoored. We’ll use last week’s mail for fire fuel, and melt the ice that surrounds Maria’s heart for drinking water. The cats have already caught a couple fish, although one of them scratched me as I took it away from him. But Maria knows first aid, having taken medical training with the sea cadets.

We’ve always wanted to see Hawai’i, looks like we’ll achieve our dream. Perhaps we’ll just fashion a new anchor out of old socks filled with knickknacks from around the house, and set up our new homestead on one of the outlying islands. Maria has already lassoed some seagulls and is harvesting their eggs, and teaching them to play piano for amusement. Their singing along though, has got to stop soon. It sounds like a quartet of Phyllis Diller on steroids.

We fear no pirates, for Chief Maria is a formidable opponent, and any seafaring criminal would do well to avoid her, especially at certain times of the month. Typhoons worry us not because our home is well-insured, and we used up all the aluminum foil as a barrier to spurious radiation from the Japanese failed reactor at Fukushima. I firmly believe if sharks sought us out, as a professional courtesy they’d leave us alone once our identity became known to them.

So John, all your worries are for naught. Maria is an able sailor and we are comfortable in our floating home. After a month of rain, we’re used to seeing water, water everywhere, so this constant Pacific is nothing new to us. We hope to see the stars and the sun again, and we’re looking forward to our impromptu vacation.

Love you!

Lisa

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